Happy Sunday Folks!
Thank you for being a part of my journey towards being the biggest moviestar in Los Angeles :) This post is the first in a three part series on a topic that is very important no matter who you are or what you do..CONFIDENCE. We all need help with this from time to time. So let me help you (and me) by recounting my personal path that led me to being confident.
When you get right down to it, no single thing is more important to your individual success than confidence in yourself and your abilities. Its more important than desire..or luck or even hard work. As important as those things are, if you are not confident in yourself and what you are doing its not going to happen for you. If you seek success in a group/team situation you MUST have confidence in yourself, your teammates and leaders. That confidence will make the preparation, hard work and desire come together in a glorious payoff for all involved. We all love to talk about those moments when we are maneuvering with complete confidence. Lets start from the beginning when a person doesn't have much confidence at all.
You've heard the expression "Fake it til you make it"? People say that in relation to several different topics so I'm certainly not telling you this for the first time. Here is something that I likely am telling you for the first time..In the quest for bullet-proof, unflappable, moviestar, no f*****g doubt confidence the truth is you have to start out fake..100% absolutely FAKE. Before you hop on your authenticity high horse and get all disenchanted with me, think about what your alternative is..NO confidence. If my choice is fake it or have zero confidence I would gladly choose to have fake confidence for a few months as a bridge while I work on (part 2 of the series) building real confidence. OK, so how do we fake it?
Exaggerate! Exaggerate your abilities, your skills..your EVERYTHING. This is different from bragging or boasting though it will look the same from those on the outside. Its about you having some positive self-conversations to build your self image, which is crucial to your confidence. Look in the mirror and tell yourself that "Sure, you CAN do that". Eventually, tell your friends that you can do it too. As for what it is, choose anything that you have even the most basic of knowledge and skills in. Start talking as if you are better at that thing than you are. An old basketball coach once told me that "If you are exactly as good as you say you are, you have a pretty low opinion of yourself." His point was always tell people you are a little bit better than you are. As you have been faking it, people are going to want to see these skills. Good!! The pressure you have added means you will go for that higher level and by definition be better than you are usually. This pressure will make you fail in the beginning. THATS FINE! The reward of the feeling you will have from attacking something with confidence (and failing) is worth it. Besides, you were failing before with zero confidence. This way you at least look like you have a chance to be successful. When you step away and examine this failure you will be able to see that you did not succeed but you did MUCH BETTER than you did before with zero confidence and zero pressure. You must examine the failures and successes you have to see where you did improve as well as where you need to improve going forward (More in part 2).
Let me condense it all so we get the lesson:
You MUST RISK the failures that will come about with your new fake confidence.
You MUST RISK that people may look at you as a braggart and arrogant.
You MUST REVIEW what you did right and wrong to set and eventually raise your baseline of confidence.
I'm always gonna be honest with you guys. Honestly, the lessons you learn will be PAINFUL up front. Its gonna hurt like hell emotionally and physically. That being said, all the rejections and falling on my face (literally in some cases) seem funny and endearing when I look back on them today with a confident mind. What I'm trying to say is the trip was definitely worth the pain. So embrace that pain and start building your fortress of confidence. If you can look at yourself and honestly know that you are lacking confidence..fake it and build it.
Thanks for reading and stay tuned for Part 2. As for the quote today, its about our topic
"Every day just get better and better. Confidence breeds success and success breeds confidence. Confidence applied properly can surpass genius. There is nothing like confidence guys, there's just nothing like it"
See you soon and as always BE A MOVIESTAR...EVERYDAY!
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